The coming out?!*

So, Mum told me this week that my sister is engaged. My sister has been with her partner for over 10 years,  maybe close to 15 years. But it's always been somewhat closeted. I've known forever, and that's all well and good, doesn't bother me in the slightest, we love my sisters partner, she's awesome! But my sister chose to never really openly discuss it or publicise that they were a couple, in her Australian life that is. She lives in London and has done for close to 15 years I reckon, and presume that she's reasonably out and proud in London, but in Adelaide, different story, it's kind of like a badly kept secret that nobody talks about. Everyone kind of knows about, but not exactly.

So it's great news that they are engaged and that she has finally said it out loud to Mum, and apparently Dad is not talking about it. It's wierd, being gay in 2012 is just such a non issue. It's amazing that it still causes so much angst amongst people. To me, it just seems absurd that she just hasn't come out and had the uncomfortable conversation with my parents that she needed to have a decade ago. Now, it's all wierd. Mum is coping ok with it, and totally interested in travelling to the UK for the civil ceremony, but Dad is not.

All I have to say about that is: "Life is far too short to be worrying about shit like that". Seriously, gay / straight, blonde / brunette, black / white, boy / girl ... It's a non-issue these days isn't it? Surely?

To me, marriage means very little. Me and my partner have been engaged for nearly 3 years, been together for nearly 10 years (I think), but weddings and all that, just isn't my bag. I've always been of the opinion that I would elope, or have a very very very small wedding. And I've always been of the opinion that I'll never lower myself to inviting a bunch of people I don't want to invite out of pure obligation. One day we'll probably get married, but we've made our commitments. We've had 2 children together and for me there is no bigger commitment than that. I was always unsure of bringing children into this screwed up world, so it took someone worthy of my faith and trust to help me to do it. We've bought and sold houses, cars and white goods together, we've started a business together, so a ring and a white dress, ain't going to do anything to concrete our relationship. If it's going to succeed or fail, it'll do so with or without the white dress and bonbonnieres quite frankly. A wedding planner I'll never be, all seems like a fantastic waste of time and money to me, I'd rather just go on a holiday and skip the wedding.

I hope dad learns to accept the whole idea of having a gay daughter, because really, it's a waste of time worrying about things we can't change like that. It might lighten his emotional burden just that little bit.