What are your thoughts on this?

I ponder this alot, because my dad has a bit of a phobia about death, always has had the phobia. It's quite wierd for someone of his age. He won't discuss it, and changes the conversation or walks away whenever it becomes a topic. So I wonder what will happen when my mum reaches a certain point, where her quality of life is non-existant. Will he fear death so much that he will do any ridiculous thing to keep her alive rather than have to face her immortality?

I am of the belief (and this is what I would want for myself) that once you lose a certain quality of life and no longer appear to get much joy out of what's left of your life, that it's pointless doing surgeries, putting in pace makers, giving medications, resuscitating, things that are going to prolong life. Obviously this is all dependant on what the person in question thinks, and their religeous / moral beliefs are.

I wonder if i'll have to lay it on the line for my mum and try and fight for her right to die. I know she thinks like me, she's a nurse, she's worked in aged care for decades, she knows that she doesn't want the end to be dragged out over a period of years / decades. She's always said, "if i ever get like that, shoot me, decades before alzheimers was even in the picutre" for her.

I'd hate to have to fight with my dad over these decisions, and really I have no power, he is next of kin, he is her husband, but I feel obligated to allow her wishes to be taken into account.

It's such a scary thought that this issue could divide our whole family in the years to come. I broach the subject gently now, to test the waters, but when you are in the thick of it, is when the big cracks appear.

I have pleaded with my partner that if i ever get alzheimers, that he is never to do anything that will prolong my life, only pain relief or drugs to make me happy and comfortable for the now. I will never make him promise to keep me out of a nursing home, but i will make him promise that he won't hang on to me too tightly when the end is nigh. I will make him promise me to let me go when my time is up and to never force me to stick around for his own emotional needs.